The Long Defeat

The Long Defeat
By Sara Groves


I have joined the long defeat
that falling set in motion
and all my strength and energy
are raindrops in the ocean

so conditioned for the win
to share in victor's stories
but in the place of ambition's din
I have heard of other glories

and I pray for an idea
and a way i cannot see
it's too heavy to carry
and impossible to leave

I can't just fight when I think I'll win
that's the end of all belief
and nothing has provoked it more
than a possible defeat

chorus

we walk a while we sit and rest
we lay it on the altar
I won't pretend to know what's next
but what I have I've offered

and I pray for a vision
and a way I cannot see
it's too heavy to carry
and impossible to leave

and I pray for inspiration
and a way I cannot see
it's too heavy to carry
and impossible to leave
it's too heavy to carry
and I will never leave


Such a beautiful song; I listen to it in tears in the car and while I do dishes at home. I sing along, and sometimes say it like a prayer, since it seems like the struggle my husband faces daily on the job. Police officers occasionally arrest the same person twice in a twelve-hour period; what could be more discouraging than that? But their passion for justice is a weight they carry, and they cannot lay it down. If they could, I'm sure they would do something with a bigger paycheck and more positive feedback. But they cannot leave it; they offer all, day after day. I would just like to offer my gratitude and my support as a wife of one of these amazing men.